Don't Call it a Comeback

So I have been on the anti-depressants for about 2 months.
And for a while they really seemed to be helping, like a lot. I thought the "bad time" was behind us. Then over the last two weeks I have "relapsed," I don't even know what the fuck to call it.
But I feel crazier than before.
So strange. I was feeling GGGGGRREEEAAAAATTTT! Making plans, showering, having dinner ready on the table. Actually able to accomplish things and not just dwell under a shitload of doubt, sadness, and fear.
Now I am at a deeper pit than I was. I am scared.
I want this to stop.
I cannot even begin to tell you how much shit our fucking insurance has put us through.

I am taking my meds, WTF?

I have an emergency visit with my shrink today. Since he is going on Holiday. And jon stayed home from work on Tuesday and now he feels stressed about his job.

So we are out here, crazy, alone and no job security. At least the weather is nice...