I have just been so bored with myself lately.
When I started this blog it was meant to be a way to keep up with old pals without having to keep writing the same emails over and over again. Then it became this whole other world where strangers knew me intimately and I knew them, to a selective degree.
all I do now is bitch. I am not funny or an inspired writer.
When I am not silent I am complaining.
I thought I would be able to recap the hilarity that is motherhood. har har har.
In fact, it seems to be a trail of tears, vomit and disappointment.
So I don't know. Maybe I can just be or not.
or I'll post tomorrow...
Thursday, June 22, 2006
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
Well, it is my blog
SO I took down a really dark post - wasn't the first time and it won't be the last. You know what? It was a downer. I don't particularly want to remember that, and really this blog is for remembering.
jon got back from China on Saturday, we got home sunday. We all took a ride on a boat with jon's company last night, a bay cruise.
And today he went to Seattle.
He told me his flight would land at 5:15. I have been counting down the hours all day. I am sick of holding the baby. I am sick of listening to him whine. He is at that stage. "I am not crawling or getting my shit done so I am just going to kvetch all fucking day." It is now almost 6 and jon isn't picking up his phone. So I guess he is still on the plane.
Nothing pleases the baby. I am so tired of him. I just want to run away.
I certainly don't feel like this. I wonder if I ever will.
jon got back from China on Saturday, we got home sunday. We all took a ride on a boat with jon's company last night, a bay cruise.
And today he went to Seattle.
He told me his flight would land at 5:15. I have been counting down the hours all day. I am sick of holding the baby. I am sick of listening to him whine. He is at that stage. "I am not crawling or getting my shit done so I am just going to kvetch all fucking day." It is now almost 6 and jon isn't picking up his phone. So I guess he is still on the plane.
Nothing pleases the baby. I am so tired of him. I just want to run away.
I certainly don't feel like this. I wonder if I ever will.
Friday, June 09, 2006
Sunday, June 04, 2006
Cooked
Stick a fork in me I'm done.
I have been alone with the baby for 5 freakin days. Wow. I do not know how single mothers do it. You really can't do this all alone.
The baby has been good. But you know that is a lot of face time.
There were several melt-downs. I wrote an awful sadistic, scathing, email to jon. Because I am mature - I can even throw down with a nice electronic hissy fit.
I am getting on a four hour flight tomorrow to Atlanta. To my MIL's - YIKES!
The baby has not been so good at night. I went to rub some homeopathic crap on his gums and I felt another tooth. Poor kid has 2 teeth in as many weeks. Are they supposed to come in this fast? Right on top of the other? My poor little button.
My friend Kelly came over today to sit with the baby while I ran back and forth across the street to the Laundromat. I would give up meat for a washing machine (that is sayin something). The baby doesn't like kelly for some reason and did this adorable scared crying and clung to my neck. It was so cute. I don't know why he was so afraid, but I laughed and laughed.
Baby and mama have been having multiple experiences tooling around San Francisco in our new city share car. I am into it.
Today we went to CitiKids. Bad idea. But I needed the sit and stroll.
God I feel so fucking burnt out. Just dumb and wasted.
I shall be spending the next week biting my tongue in Atlanta. God I am a glutton for punishment. I hope to post from there.
I have been alone with the baby for 5 freakin days. Wow. I do not know how single mothers do it. You really can't do this all alone.
The baby has been good. But you know that is a lot of face time.
There were several melt-downs. I wrote an awful sadistic, scathing, email to jon. Because I am mature - I can even throw down with a nice electronic hissy fit.
I am getting on a four hour flight tomorrow to Atlanta. To my MIL's - YIKES!
The baby has not been so good at night. I went to rub some homeopathic crap on his gums and I felt another tooth. Poor kid has 2 teeth in as many weeks. Are they supposed to come in this fast? Right on top of the other? My poor little button.
My friend Kelly came over today to sit with the baby while I ran back and forth across the street to the Laundromat. I would give up meat for a washing machine (that is sayin something). The baby doesn't like kelly for some reason and did this adorable scared crying and clung to my neck. It was so cute. I don't know why he was so afraid, but I laughed and laughed.
Baby and mama have been having multiple experiences tooling around San Francisco in our new city share car. I am into it.
Today we went to CitiKids. Bad idea. But I needed the sit and stroll.
God I feel so fucking burnt out. Just dumb and wasted.
I shall be spending the next week biting my tongue in Atlanta. God I am a glutton for punishment. I hope to post from there.
Friday, June 02, 2006
Thus Far
The only new thing about being 30 is that I have started to part my hair on the other side - A tiny step towards life altering.
I am trying to hide the greys that are sprouting in a timely manner.
I bought myself my own damn birthday present. While I know it seems very domestic, but I should have a decent vacuum. I really wanted it and now I have it. The baby is going to be crawling around on these floors, at least in theory. They need to be f'n clean! It is like the low class BMW or Lexus of vacuums. It was also a #1 pick from Consumer Reports.
I have been making food for the baby. So far he has consumed yams, refined rice, avocado, banana, and brown rice. The brown rice made him retch. We went back to the refined rice. This book is my baby food bible, thanks so much for sending it to me Francesca! Mia and I refer to it as The Book of Ruth.
I am sorry. Jon isn't here and I have to tell this shit to someone.
I am trying to hide the greys that are sprouting in a timely manner.
I bought myself my own damn birthday present. While I know it seems very domestic, but I should have a decent vacuum. I really wanted it and now I have it. The baby is going to be crawling around on these floors, at least in theory. They need to be f'n clean! It is like the low class BMW or Lexus of vacuums. It was also a #1 pick from Consumer Reports.
I have been making food for the baby. So far he has consumed yams, refined rice, avocado, banana, and brown rice. The brown rice made him retch. We went back to the refined rice. This book is my baby food bible, thanks so much for sending it to me Francesca! Mia and I refer to it as The Book of Ruth.
I am sorry. Jon isn't here and I have to tell this shit to someone.
Thursday, June 01, 2006
Backtrack
Sunday May 29th. Baby turns 6 months old.
So we signed up for City CarShare I unilaterally decided that we were going to go explore the countryside, as it were. Jon has seen none of the beauty and glory that is Northern California. I decided that was going to end, I took a car out for 6 hours.
I decided we would go to Point Reyes National Seashore. Worst Family Day Trip Ever!
I didn't know what to expect, I thought we'd drive up there and hike a bit and drive home. I know there were some beaches and it was supposed to be spectacular. I was informed that McClures Beach is really pretty and I sort of set my destination there. It took forever to get there. And once we got there, we didn't really know where there was. It took 2 hours to get to the beach. We hiked a little to this tiny beach. It was really pretty. We look like we had fun. Jon wanted to know where we were going and I just plodded on very much like my father.
We could only stay at the beach a little while and of course we overstayed. We couldn't get a signal on our cell phone to call cityshare to tell them we are going to be hella late, DRAMA!
The baby poops on the way home, DRAMA!
Jon got carsick from turning around to tend to the baby while I drove on super windy roads that were literally feet away from certain death. DRAMA!
The menfolk were certainly unhappy. The baby cried for the last hour or so. Jon was super fucking crabby. I was kinda like, fuck'em. It's my birthday I am going to enjoy it.
So we signed up for City CarShare I unilaterally decided that we were going to go explore the countryside, as it were. Jon has seen none of the beauty and glory that is Northern California. I decided that was going to end, I took a car out for 6 hours.
I decided we would go to Point Reyes National Seashore. Worst Family Day Trip Ever!
I didn't know what to expect, I thought we'd drive up there and hike a bit and drive home. I know there were some beaches and it was supposed to be spectacular. I was informed that McClures Beach is really pretty and I sort of set my destination there. It took forever to get there. And once we got there, we didn't really know where there was. It took 2 hours to get to the beach. We hiked a little to this tiny beach. It was really pretty. We look like we had fun. Jon wanted to know where we were going and I just plodded on very much like my father.
We could only stay at the beach a little while and of course we overstayed. We couldn't get a signal on our cell phone to call cityshare to tell them we are going to be hella late, DRAMA!
The baby poops on the way home, DRAMA!
Jon got carsick from turning around to tend to the baby while I drove on super windy roads that were literally feet away from certain death. DRAMA!
The menfolk were certainly unhappy. The baby cried for the last hour or so. Jon was super fucking crabby. I was kinda like, fuck'em. It's my birthday I am going to enjoy it.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)